Donald Trump Roasted, Upstaged and Then Fired By Indy 500

The last two weeks have been eventful for The Donald. There was the Trump Triumph of prodding Obama into producing his long-form birth certificate. Sure, Obama was tactically brilliant. The percentage of Americans believing the birther conspiracy fell to 10%. But Obama's action also could be viewed as elevating Trump to national standing as a potential candidate, which may have been Obama's intention.

The next day he swore repeatedly in a speech in Las Vegas, embarrassing Republicans including Lindsey Graham of South Carolina who called it “unpresidential”. The theme of the speech was his criticism of Obama’s policies, mostly in foreign affairs. The level of his critical thinking is best demonstrated by his comment, “Our leaders are stupid.”

That same week, last Saturday, our favourite cartoon candidate was roasted by comedian Seth Meyers and, of course, President Obama at the White House Correspondents’ Dinner.

Meyers’ routine seems to have been an ordeal for him as Trump did not smile once during Meyers’ onslaught. Trump later lambasted Meyers as having “no talent” and being a “stutterer”.

The following night we discovered that Obama had ordered the mission to kill Osama bin Laden, which gave an extra dimension to the words he used to mock Trump’s firing decisions in ‘The Celebrity Apprentice’, "These are the types of decisions that would keep me up at night. Well handled, sir."

Obama also said:

“Donald Trump ... he’s taken some flak lately, but no one is prouder to put this birth certificate to rest than The Donald. Now he can get to focusing on the issues that matter. Like, did we fake the moon landing? What really happened at Roswell? And where are Biggie and Tupac?”

The audience laughed and applauded while The Donald fumed.

The next day, Obama’s speech announcing the killing of Bin Laden pre-empted ‘Celebrity Apprentice’ and drew the biggest TV audience for any Obama speech.  Many have remarked on the irony.

Trump was recently selected to be the driver of the pace car for the 100th anniversary of the Indianapolis 500. Now, he has cancelled citing “time and business constraints”. Not everyone is convinced. Some believe that the Indianapolis Motor Speedway withdrew the invite as Trump is seen as a divisive character due to his birther speeches.

The Wig Trumpet has said he would announce whether or not he would run for the presidential nomination after the current season of ‘Celebrity Apprentice’ ends on May 22. Most likely, we will have to wait until June to find out if Don-Don will take on the fight.

Trump Scores, Obama Scores Even Bigger, Trump Is "Carnival Barker"

People don’t believe that Donald Trump’s hair is real,  much less that his presidential candidacy is real.  But Trump today scored a victory in his bid for credibility when President Barack Obama released his long form birth certificate in an attempt to reaffirm that he was born in the USA.  

Trump had brought this issue back into the media, embarrassing the Republican establishment.  A Gallup poll showed about a quarter of Americans believed that the President was “definitely” or “probably” born in another country. Obama did not mention Trump by name, but he did say, "We do not have time for this kind of silliness."  Silliness - that’s The Donald in one word, but far from unique.

Obama tried again. He went on to say that Americans would not be able to solve pressing problems "if we get distracted by sideshows and carnival barkers.”.

Carnival barker! That’s The Donald in two words. Brilliantly succinct.

In a New Hampshire press conference, Trump rushed to take credit for the release of the birth certificate, as he should. He told the press, “I’m very proud of myself because I've accomplished something that nobody else has been able to accomplish."  

Obama has in one fell swoop elevated a buffoon to the status of a real contender, complicating the Republicans' attempt to take the Presidency next year.  If Trump were to compete with Obama next year, Obama would easily win.

The birth certificate release won’t stop Trump from pursuing his complaints about Obama’s education.  I'll post on that once I have the guts for explaining Trump's darker side. The mainstream media tends to avoid this bitching about Barry's education as it is downright unpleasant.

Back to something lighter. Trump had semi-promised George Stephanopoulos (ABC, Good Morning America) that he would now release his tax returns once Obama had released his birth certificate.

Sure, sure – there’s a better chance of Al Gore being elected President.

Now, can we have proof that The Donald’s hair was born in this country?

Dumbest Guy in the Room. (Is that still true if the 'Jersey Shore' cast is there too?)

The Donald has said that he would impose a 25% tariff on all imports from China. Subsequently and even more ridiculously, he amended this to a 25% to 40% tariff range. He may be a billionaire, but he is also a dunce who hasn’t heard of the World Trade Organization. America would of course be subject to retaliatory measures and penalties if it did what Trump is suggesting.  He’ll say anything to get attention, of course. I’m starting to think that he’s the Democratic Party’s Manchurian candidate – in this case, programmed to upset any possibility of the Republicans winning in 2012.

He has in the past contributed more to the Democrats than the Republicans.  (The Dem recipients even include Charles Rangel.) Trump’s excuse is that he works in New York City, and has no choice.

Trump hasn’t voted in the NYC primary elections since 1989, according to the New York City Board of Elections. Is he a man who gives a damn?  He did furiously deny this accusation, but apparently, he also didn’t vote in some presidential primaries.

In case you - like me - think that Trump isn’t serious about his candidacy, be aware that conservative columnist and Fox News commentator Charles Krauthammer has called Trump “destructive” and compared him to Al Sharpton (nice one Chucky, or is that comparison about their hair?). Incidentally, Robert De Niro last night compared Trump to a car salesman.

Trump phoned Krauthammer and persuaded him that his candidacy was serious. Krauthammer now believes Trump is definitely campaigning for the Republican nomination.

Trump has been working the phones. He called Eliot Spitzer (CNN, In the Arena) on Friday to complain that he was worth much more than Spitzer’s on-screen speculation. Trump claimed that he was worth much more than the Forbes estimate of $2.7 billion The Donald also told Spitzer that he’d release his financial records when he formally enters the campaign.

I’ve seen the Forbes figure as $2.4 billion, but never mind. In any event, Forbes calls him 153rd richest in USA. Forbes also calls him the ‘Dumbest Guy in the Room’ for his suggestion to  George Stephanopoulos (ABC, Good Morning America) that the US should ‘reimburse’ itself for the money spent on the Iraq war by seizing the Iraqi oilfields – by military force.

Of course, if he had to win, it might not be all bad. In Melania Trump, we’d have a former Sports Illustrated Swimsuit cover model as First Lady. I had first thought that Sarkozy might then visit the White House more often, but I now recall that Trump dated Carla Bruni!


 

The Donald's Extra Gift For The Dems

Now just suppose Trump's will really try and secure the Republican 2012 presidential nomination and is not just hyping to increase The Celebrity Apprentice ratings.

Sure, that's far-fetched, but let's just fantasize. The Republican establishment will try and crush the nom. If they fail, Trump runs for president without even a tiny chance of winning. Obama then walks the race in 2012, winning say 56% to Trump's 43% or so. A landslide by modern standards. A gift for the Democratic party.

But if the Republican succeed in ensuring that Trump is not nominated, there's a even bigger gift for the Dems. Trump claims he will run as an independent if he doesn't secure the Republican nomination. That's an even bigger gift for the Dems in splitting the Republican vote.

Trump as Ross Perot - oh, bring it on.

(To recap that history, Perot split the vote in 1992, electing Clinton. He tried to repeat the favour in 1996, although his contribution that year was irrelevant as Clinton slightly out-polled Dole and Perot combined.)